#3 A Story Of Hansel And Gretal

Yes, yes dear readers. Im sure you've heard about this story before
Ah, but, this is a very different story.
An adult version. No, no, its not THAT adulty, but for teens.
If you're not a teen, i strongly suggest you to dont read this post.
But, wait, what am i saying? Of course you'll like to read MY version of Hansel and Gretal.

As everyone knows, Hansel and Gretal lost they're mother and they're father married another woman. But, one day, Hansel and Gretal's father fell sick and he couldn't work for a week. When he is fully recover, the whole family realized that their live stocks and vegetables started to die due to the heat of the sun. That night, while both children were asleep, the wife talked to her husband, suggesting that they should get rid of their kids so they could have enough food for themselves. Of course the husband was shocked and fortunately, while the wife was suggesting the the husband, Gretal woke up and she over heard her parents talking. Quietly, she went out and gather pebbles and put it in her pockets.

The next morning, while the children are having their breakfast, their mother sat next to them and said:

"Darlings, could you kindly follow me and we'll go to the woods to find strawberries for you father, it's a special surprise."

Both children agreed and as soon as they finished their breakfast, both children set out with their step mother. Halfway through the woods, their mother said:

"My darlings, go on, I'll catch up. Im very tired and we still haven find any strawberries. Go on, Ill catch up with you."

And she smiled while sitting on a rock. Truthfully, they only walk about 20 feet from their house. But because the trees are thick, making it look like they are far from their home. As soon as both children are out of sight, the sly mother ran home. But, on the way home, a hungry wolf came out of no where and it pounced on her and ripped her flesh apart.

[to be continued.. due to stupidity of my mom.. =x]

#2 Hello There

Hi, Marissa here.
Well, this blog seems kinda very dead, so yeah.
Here I am! :D

Well, I'm just gonna start crapping, if you don't mind.
Feel free to stop reading at any time, especially if you feel nauseous, dizzy or confused*.

*This blog shall not be held accountable for any injuries, puke on the floor, too much laughter, too much fart whatsoever.

Anyway, as I was saying..
Not that I was actually saying anything interesting.
It's just that I was saying some stuff but it wasn't very important.

But that doesn't mean you didn't have to read it.
Not that you didn't read it.
I mean, you already didn't not read it.
So what's the point, yeah?

ANYWAAAY.
I'm very bored right now.
This is just another one of Marissa's lame attempts to revive a half-dead blog.
Well, to be exact, VERY dead.
As said in the first paragraph - very dead! :D

Also, I am very freaked out.
Why? D:
Mostly because the other day, I had a very scary dream.
Well, actually, it was pretty cool.
Just a little freaky, that's all. :D

Anyway, you wanna know my dream?
I'm sure you do.
If you don't wanna listen to my story, then I'm gonna be a very sad child. D:

Then again..
Heck cares about what you think! :D
I'm just gonna go on, and tell you what my dream was about!

:B
:B
:B
:B
:B
:B
:B
:B
:B

No, that wasn't my dream.
It's just a really cool smiley that I find really cool.
Do YOU think it's cool? :D

If you don't, then you suck. ):
But anyway, I know DEEP down, you think this smiley is cool.

Then again, who cares about what you think? :D
Oh wait, I care. D:

But that doesn't matter, because I'm the blogger, and you're the reader.
So who are you to make comments about my nonsense-filled and long-winded post? D:

So anyway, as I was previously saying until I was rudely interrupted by those really cool smileys (which I typed, BTW :D :D :D), I had a freaky dream! :B

It was about Maple! S:
Can you believe it?!
C'mon, I don't even play Maple anymore!

Have YOU played Maple? :D
Ah, yes, I see some hands there.
But even if you haven't played it before, I'm sure you've heard of it.

If you haven't heard about it, go Google it NOW! :D
Then you'll know.
Okay, once you've found out what Maple is, I can continue my story. :B

Anyway, I dreamt about Maple, but it wasn't Maple in a cartoony form.
It was like a REAL LIFE MAPLE! :D
How cool is that, yeah? (:

So, I want you to imagine three real life Maple characters, and a guy dressed up in a mushroom costume! :D

These three Maple characters were fighting this mushroom guy.
After a little while of hitting with a soft toy bat, all four of them rested. :D

Except that there was this one guy, who was wondering why the mushroom guy wasn't dead yet!
YES, he was stupid enough to think that the mushroom guy was actually supposed to DIE, like in Maple. :B

Anyway, that paticular guy took a butcher knife, charged at the mushroom guy - who was drinking water - AND KILLED HIM!

But before the mushroom guy died, the guy was like stabbing him over and over again like some possessed, mad, Maple freak. :B

The whole place was splattered with BLOOOOD. D:
And when the mushroom guy fell, the guy holding the butcher knife suddenly said..

"OMG. I KILLED HIM. NOOOOOOOOOO."

And I'm like thinking..
Why are you so depressed you killed him when you wanted him dead all along?

LAME-O.

Hehehe.
Well, okay.
I'll stop now.

I know that was a whole lot of crap, but I don't care. :B

BYE NOW!

#1 Jill Is A Killer In The Nursery Rhymes

anyone know the rhymes that goes like this:

Jack and Jill
went up the hill
to fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down
and broke his crown
and Jill came tumbling after.

yes, that nursery rhymes.
after being Detective Surlock,
i am sure that Jill is a suspect for pushing Jack down.
apparently, Jack hold her as he fell down,
in revenge for pushing him.

lately, i've been hearing alot of complains.
for an instant,

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the King's horses and all the King's man
Had to put Humpty Dumpty back together again.

im thinking,
why the hell would Humpty purposely fall down again?
to make the King angry?
i have interviewed Humpty and here is what he have to say;
Me and Humpty

so Humpty, i heard you fall of the wall again, why is that?
i didnt fall of [said in a huffy voice] i was pushed
pushed? what makes you say that?
i heard a girl's giggle when i was sun bathing.
a girl's giggle?
yes, a girl's giggle. then i felt a pair of small tiny hands on my back and pushed me down.
did you see anything when your pushed down?
yes, i saw a girl running.
anything pacific about her girl?
not really, but i know she has a high pitched laughter.
thank you, Humpty. i hope you get well soon. dont go off sitting on the walls again until i caught this 'girl'.
[shakes my hand] your welcome, Detective. i hope you find this girl as soon as possible.

then, i set off finding some other people to interview and confirm my suspension about Jill.
i found a girl named, Miss Muffet..
do you remember the rhyme about her?

Little Miss Muffet,
sat on a tuffet,
Eating her curds and whey;
Along came a spider,
Who sat down beside her
And frightened Miss Muffet away.

i went to her house and had a nice long chat with her.
Me and Miss Muffet

Good Morning, Miss Muffet.
Good Morning, Detective Kim.
I've heard that a spider came and scared you away.
ah yes, its all over on the news.
im came here to find who did this. i heard you told Bo Peep it was a fake spider.
yes, yes. it was a fake spider, but i get jumpy when i see a spider, doesnt matter if its real a not.
do have any idea who did it?
im not sure, but as i ran, i heard a high pitched laughter.
any other things?
when i was walking back to my curds and whey, i saw a girl in red and she has a pleated blond hair. but as soon as i arrived, she saw me and went running away with my curds and whey.
hmmm, i see... well, thanks for cooperating with me, Miss Muffet.
your very much welcome. [shakes hand] good luck.

the next day, i heard an old man went into a coma.
i was like, COMA!?
i heard a few people muttering about him and i saw Little Bo Peep.
Me and Little Bo Peep.

Little Bo Peep, could you tell me what happened?
oh didnt you hear his rhyme?
no, but im sure you could tell me.

It's raining, it's pouring;
The old man is snoring.
Bumped his head
And he went to bed
And he couldn't get up in the morning

that sounds eerie.
yes it is.
i heard you were the one that found him.
yes, yes i did.
did you see anything unusual?
hmm... i saw a dry pail with blood on it. it could be the old man's blood [shudder]
anything else?
yes, i heard a high pitch laughter downstairs. but as soon as i reached downstairs, the person was running.
running from the crime scene?
yes, i saw she has a red dress and she vanished in the woods.
hmm, thank you Bo Peep. but i heard you were dealing this kind of thing too. im sorry to hear you lost your sheeps.
thank you for your concern.
do you know anyone who would do this?
i am thinking of red riding hood, but i saw a golden head.
hmm, thank you Bo Peep. i have to go, bye.
bye

this is the rhyme she had:

Little Bo Peep has lost her sheep
And can't tell where to find them.
Leave them alone,
And they'll come home,
Wagging their tails behind them

Little Bo-Peep fell fast asleep,
And dreamt she heard them bleating;
But when she awoke, she found it a joke,
For still they all were fleeting.
Then up she took her little crook,
Determined for to find them;
She found them indeed,
but it made her heart bleed,
For they'd left all their tails behind 'em!

It happened one day, as Bo-peep did stray Unto a meadow hard by--
There she espied their tails, side by side,
All hung on a tree to dry.
She heaved a sigh and wiped her eye,
And over the hillocks she raced;
And tried what she could,
as a shepherdess should,
That each tail should be properly placed.

poor Bo Peep.
i finally got all the evidence i had,
as i went to the judge, i heard a loud scream and saw a girl in red dress and a golden head rushed out of hte house, laughing her high pitched laugh.
but i was concern about the scream and rushed in the house
and there i saw was a man down the stairs.
his head was in an odd angle.

on his shirt i saw a note, it said;
Goosey, goosey, gander,
Whither shall I wander?
Upstairs, and downstairs,
And in my lady's chamber.

There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers!
I took him by the left leg
And threw him down the stairs.

i knew this had gone to far. an old man killed cause he didnt say his prayers?
this is madness.
i rushed to the court and the judge gave me a trail.
i got all Jill's victim's and someone gave me a snap shot of Jill pushing Jack down the hill.
after listening to my evidence, Jill was send to JAIL for a life time.

my theory was right after all. Jill was a murderer.
here is a picture of her pushing poor jack down the hill.